You know that one co-worker . . .

• You know that one co-worker you'd rather hit with a brick than say hello to
• You know that one co-worker who you smell before you see
• You know that one co-worker who has been doing your job for a shorter time than you but knows every damn thing
• You know that one co-worker who's breath smells like he ate a diarrhea sandwich with a side of shit fries. 

It's too early for this. And by the way, Happy Saturday. 

Old Spice and Obama haters

There are two type of people who shop at Wonderland. Men who bathe in Old Spice and Obama haters.

I understand everyone isn't going to love the President. But some of the Old Spice Obama Haters blame this man for their bouts with gout. But were you in the Armed Forces? Nah. Did you sign up for Obamacare? Nah. And you haven't been to the doctor? Nah. Why are you mad, son?

And what's crazy is, my coworkers in Wonderland engage in conversations with the loony toons, revealing that if we didn't have uniforms, they'd probably wear sheets to work.

Revising my resume as I type.
Later, my manager is watching.